I sat on the beach watching the waves roll in. I was on a small tropical island somewhere in the Pacific. I had been there, marooned, for what I calculated to be somewhere close to two years. I had survived a plane crash and washed ashore later. I was accompanied by several pieces of luggage that I found while combing the beach over the next few days. I had never been in a survival situation before and had no training for it except watching several TV shows on the subject. I remembered some of what I’d learned on these shows and the information had helped to get established on the island.
I had managed to build a shelter out of raw materials, build fire, and survive on crabs and cocoanuts. Later I had been able to cobble together some fishing gear and added fish, clams, squid, and other seafood to my diet. A few excursions to the inner island had led to the discovery of a freshwater source, some naturally growing tubers that were pretty good when fire roasted, and evidence of wild pigs. I eventually trapped a couple of the pigs later, but it was an arduous activity. I had managed to survive, but I had lost a lot of weight over my time on the island and I cannot really say I thrived. Injury and illness were also constant threats to my well being, for which I had very few resources to deal with.
Today had been a good day. Couldn’t really remember what I’d done, just puttering around with the fire, that sort of thing. I was contemplating attempting to catch something for supper, but i really wasn’t hungry, which was odd. Since I’d been on the island I had constantly been hungry.
The sun hung over the horizon in late afternoon and I watch some seabirds flying down the beach. When I turned back to the ocean I noticed that there was a person seated a few feet to my left. Seeing this startled me. I had seen no one in the two years I’d been here. I had not seen any boats around and I could not imagine how someone could be sitting next to me on this beach. It was a male, wearing cutoff shorts with a white shirt, with no shoes. He was slender, with dark hair and a tan. He sat and watched me, then smiled.
“Hello.” I said to him
He dipped his head in a slight nod to me. Curious.
“My name is Ian.” I said “and yours?”
“My name is Ram.” he replied
He seemed totally relaxed and at ease. It was a bit unnerving.
“Ram, where did you come from? What are you doing here?” I asked
He gazed at me evenly, rose, and moved to sit closer to me. After calmly watching the sea for a few minutes he turned to me.
“I am here for you Ian. I am your guardian angel.” he said
The possibility that I was hallucinating became very real to me at that moment. If I was hallucinating however, it was one hell of an hallucination as Ram appeared to be as real as anybody I had ever encountered in my life. I reached out and touched his shoulder to verify that he was, in fact, solid.
“Get the fuck out of here man.” I said
“Yes” he said “that is the reaction we normally get from our charges, but it is true Ian, I am your guardian angel.”
“Well Ram. If you are my guardian angel, you’re doing a piss poor job of it wouldn’t you say? I mean my life wasn’t going particularly well anyway, then a fucking plane crash, and now this Gilligan’s Island shit? I don’t mean to sound ungrateful or anything, but damn!”
“Ian my responsibility is not to keep you from having the full experience of life. That experience might include great joy and prosperity, but it might also include great sorrow, grief, and calamity. These are all experiences that form a full human life and are to be cherished.”
“Well, I’ve really cherished mine Ram. I mean, there’s nothing like a plane crash and two years of survival to make one appreciate life. Oh man, what the fuck am I talking about. Who am I talking to?!?!? Come on man, WHO ARE YOU? Do you have a boat around the end of the island or something?”
“No Ian, as I have told you, I am an angel. My full name is Ramiel. I have been with you and watched over you for your entire life. I was there when you were born to Sarah and Ben. I was there when you were hit by a car on your bicycle when you were thirteen years of age. I was there when you fell in love with Lizbeth Whitney in the tenth grade. God sent me to watch over you and I have.”
“God? Oh right. The guy with the beard that sits in a big chair in outer space. THAT God? Tell me Ram, if you are my guardian angel then why don’t you know that I’m an atheist?”
“Come my friend, do you really think I’m not aware of that fact? Or any other fact about you? It doesn’t matter whether you believe in God or angels, the fact is, we exist whether you believe in us or not.”
What was I supposed to say to that? I couldn’t figure out who this guy was and the whole conversation was starting to really get on my nerves. I was starting wonder what Ram would think if I reached over and smacked him in his fucking face. And then I did it. It was like hitting anybody else in the face, it hurt my hand. Ram, on the other hand, didn’t seem to notice that I had done anything to his face at all.
“Why would you do that?” he asked
“Why not?” I answered “I’m getting a little tired of all of this run around and I figured if you were really an angel, then smacking you in the face shouldn’t bother you much. I’ll give you credit, it didn’t seem to. I still can’t figure out what you want from me. If you’ve been watching over me all of my life, why show up now?”
“That’s a good question Ian, and the answer may come as a bit of a shock to you. Let’s take a walk back to your hut.” he said, rising and turning toward the shore.
“You’ve done remarkably well during your time on this island.” he said as we walked
“Well it hasn’t been easy, but once I started figure out how to get some of the basic necessities together like food and water, it got a little easier.” I said
“Yes I can see that. However, there’s more to surviving than just food and water isn’t there?” he asked
“Well yeah. I mean there are other tangibles like shelter, fire, that sort of thing. Then there’s the whole psychological side of it. You’ve really got to try to keep you spirits up and keep your head on straight.”
“Yes.” he said “and there are the problems of disease or injury, correct?”
“Yes.” I said “I’ve been pretty lucky. Nothing more than a few bruises and cuts.”
“I see.” he said
By now, we had reached my campsite and were standing in front of my firepit, just outside my makeshift shelter.
“Ian, you asked why I’ve come and it’s time for me to answer you. I’ve come because you are about to die, and when you have died, you will accompany me to the next place.” he said
“What are you talking about man? I was just getting ready to get my spear and go get us some fish for dinner.” I answered
“No, you’re not. Ian, can you remember the events of the past two days?” he asked
“Sure.” I said “I got up and I would have stoked the fire, probably ate some coconuts…”
“Let me stop you there. You don’t have to recount them to me, but can you really remember everything you’ve done? Concentrate and try to think of your activities, one by one.”
I started thinking about it. Hard. I knew what I usually did during my days. There were some variations, but there was always the same set of chores that I had to get done. As I thought about it, I slowly realized that I couldn’t really remember actually doing any of these for at least a week. It actually seemed as though I’d just been sitting watching the ocean for all of that time.
“Not the whole time.” Ram said “you’ve been sick for about a week, but you’ve only been in the final stages for about a day and a half.”
“What are you talking about man. Final stages of what?” I asked
“Your life.” he said, pointing to my shelter
I moved closer to the shelter and peered in. There, at my feet, was my dying body. All of my extremities were swollen and blackening. My eyelids bulged and a vitreous liquid seeped out of my nose and mouth as I took occasional wracking breaths. The smell of urine and shit hovered in the warm tropical air. I pulled back in horror, trying to understand what was going on.
“Ian, it’s okay. Relax!” said Ram “it’s your death. It’s natural. It will be over very soon.”
We stood and regarded each other saying nothing. I had no idea what was to happen next and I was exhausted by all that had happened. Suddenly Ram looked up.
“It is done.” he said
He started toward the beach and beckoned me to follow. When we reached the water, he turned left and began walking up the beach. I followed, and soon we entered a mist.
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