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Conspiracy Theory

Wow, we live in an age of mistrust, don't we? I mean from the dawn of time there have been people (conspiracy theorists) who never take the facts surrounding an event at face value. These people can be pretty funny. You know, the moon landing was televised, Area 51 in Roswell, THERE"S NO SUCH THING AS THE MAFIA (ha ha ha!).....

And you know, the reason people believe these things is because, naturally, there have been conspiracies throughout history....Nixon and Watergate, the Kennedy Assassination, Milli Vanilli....

But as many of these theorists as there are, and as much as we hear that man has never walked on the moon, Oswald had an entourage, and 9/11 was a CIA op, the greatest conspiracy of all time is never talked about....never complained about.....not even acknowledged by most people. I'm talking about a conspiracy that has reduced most average (and not so average) citizens of this and most other countries to nothing more than Pavlovian drones running through a giant maze........what is this conspiracy I'm talking about? Come closer, listen and I'll tell you....

Decades ago, when you wanted a quick lunch, a meal after the movie with your high school sweetheart, an informal stop for a snack with the family, you went to a diner, or a drive in. There, one was served wholesome delicious food, often on real china with silverware. Then they came......the giant fast food chains....everything fast, tasteless, the same whether you ate at one in Lawrence, Kansas or Katmandu, and always served on or in paper or styrofoam. And they flourished. They situated themselves in shopping malls, next to schools; participated in marketing campaigns for TV and Movie collateral (something they learned from the breakfast cereal companies) so that before they could say their ABCs most children could scream "Smurfs at Mcdonald's, Smurfs at Mcdonalds!!!!"

But alas, even though these chains grew by leaps bounds, becoming huge corporations that rivalled some countries economically, even though they operated on profit margins that were never heard of before, even though they employed a cheap labor force of illegal immigrants and high school students that cost them zilch, this wasn't good enough. They had to find a way to cut some jobs, to streamline.....and they found it. These chains pulled off the greatest social engineering feat in the history of mankind. They already had most of the populace frequenting their establishments and paying far too much for unhealthy food, served in an unhealthy (well, aesthetically impaired at least) environment, with bad service, but it was decided at some point that the customers would not only pour their own drinks, server themselves their own condiments, but they would also be responsible for BUSING THEIR OWN TABLES!!! That's right.....after paying relatively exorbitant prices for food that is basically SHIT, these establishments would make it clear that it was the PATRONS responsibility to clean the tables!!!!

And guess what?!?!?! MOST OF THE FUCKING IDIOTS THAT ATE THERE (and let's face it -- that's most of us) BOUGHT INTO IT!!!! They not only bought into it, but if you go into a fast food restaurant today and DON'T clean up your table, in most places people will actually treat you as if you've committed the most serious breach of human decency imaginable.

And nobody talks about it. It's become accepted nee EXPECTED behavior. You have to wonder if the next trend will be cleaning the toilets at Burger King after you use them.....

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