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How about stuffing some corn husks in a pillowcase?

While I was at the theater the other night, the now common string of commercials was playing before the feature started. I HATE this, but there's nothing I can do about it. The last commercial was for a mall franchise called 'Build a Bear'. The commercial left me wide mouthed and speechless. It took me several minutes to realize that it was actually a commercial not some subversive Fellini-esque parody of a commercial.
I hate...no I FUCKING HATE malls and all of the stupid franchises that have been invented as part of the burgeoning mall culture in this country. A bunch of bored, ignorant shit heads walking around a manufactured utopia of over priced stores buying shit that they don't need from companies who only want to get their money......it makes me want to puke. But I digress. I just wanted to convey how much I hate the mentality of the people who think up these concept stores for the mall culture...and that's part of what left me speechless after seeing this commercial.
You see, I can't fucking BELIEVE that our culture has disintegrated to the point that we need a whole chain of stores that sell NOTHING but mix and match stuffed bear (and doll) parts! I mean, I could get behind someplace where you take your kids and they actually learned how to make a stuffed toy....that would be cool....but no, we get 'Build a Bear' with it's fucking smarmy tone, selling manufactured joy to the denizens of Malltopia and their kids. And the arrogance! They package this shit like it's something people actually need! And being a mall franchise I can only imagine the ridiculous prices they get for this crap....
I remember, SNL used to do a recurring skit about a mall store called 'Just Tape' that sold only tape (the sticky kind)...the running joke was that somebody would always call looking for audio tape....anyway, you KNEW that this was a joke.

These people aren't joking....

Comments

Dot Dwyer said…
How about writing about people who criticize you for no reason ? Huh ? Or how's about boxers vs briefs ? Hmmmmm ? Write about the last sunset you saw. C'mon man . . . .post pictures of yourself naked eating a chili dog !Throw me a bone , Buddy ! Throw me a Bone !!!!! You're welcome. . . . .
July 31, 2007 at 10:56 PM
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